Rocks In My Dryer

*UPDATED WITH A WINNER!* Remarkably Painless Swimsuit Shopping

Lands' End has managed me to look un-horrible in a swimsuit.  And I don't know how to give them a finer endorsement than that. 

I've long been a Lands' End fan (their little boys' pants are the only ones I've found that can actually make it through three rounds of hand-me-downs), but I'd never had one of their swimsuits before.  I have one for the first time this season, and I love it. And yes, I know that $100 is pricey for a swimsuit, but I aim to go swimsuit shopping only once a decade.  Ten dollars a year isn't bad.

This top (in navy and white) and this skirt (in navy) are mine.  They are, of course, in a size 4.  [*insert sound of lightning striking me down for that lie*]. 

Because I love you, and because I love Lands' End, and because Lands' End loves you, and because we're all just one big happy swimsuit love-fest, they're offering a $100 Lands' End gift certificate to be given away to one lucky commenter on this post.  Leave a comment, and I'll draw a random winner a tomorrow (Saturday) morning at 9 am CST.

*UPDATE*  Comments are now closed--the contest is over.  The winner is Jill from Omaha (@cox.net).  Congratulations!

*UPDATE WITH WINNER* Oh, I Will Shill For Mr. Darcy ANY Day.

Get ready to swoon like a proper Jane Austen heroine, girls, because I just learned that A&E has put out a mega-pack of their best literary romance classics.  INCLUDING Jane Eyre and Pride and Prejudice, two of the best movies ever made.  Have you seen them?  I swear, the people at A&E could do a remake of Weekend At Bernie's and I'd have to watch it with a box of Kleenex. 

Anyhoo, they're available in one gigantically lovely boxed set now, and I am just absolutely tickled over it.  And, even better, they're giving one away to one lucky commenter on this post (retail value is $99.95).  Leave any comment, and I'll draw a random winner sometime tomorrow (Wednesday) afternoon.  Extra points if you tell me what you love about Jane Austen's Mr. Darcy.  Okay, no extra points, but let's just talk about Mr. Darcy. 

**UPDATE**
Comments are closed, the contest is over, and the lucky winner is Lora Lynn.  Congratulations! 

Bloggy Business

::  Wow, y'all will show up for some free ice cream, won't you?  Hubs asked me if women really get that excited about ice cream.  Poor man, he just doesn't get it.  Anyway, the lucky winner is Melissa.  Congratulations!

::  If you've tried your hand at the knock-off Pottery Barn canvases I blogged about a couple of weeks ago, send me a photo of your finished product!  I've gotten a few already, and I've been working on my own set of them--I'll post them all, for a giant show-and-tell.

::  Shalee has a fun Bite Back-related giveaway going on at her blog--go check it out.

::  My son Joseph just woke up as a six-year-old this morning--for the last time.  I don't like it one bit.  But still...happy birthday (tomorrow), my boy!

A Conversation With My Dad, and a Hayfu Winner

*Ringing phone*

Me:  Hello?

Dad:  What the heck is a hay-fu?

Me: Huh?

Dad: A hay-fu.  Or a tofu.  Or whatever it is--that thing on your blog.  What is it?

Me:  Do you mean a haiku?

Dad: Yeah, that.

Me: Dad, do you seriously not know what a haiku is?

Dad:  No, I don't.

Me:  It's a kind of Japanese poetry--three lines, with a set number of syllables.  Your six-year-old grandson knows what a haiku is.

Dad: Well, you know, a person can't learn everything all at once.  I'm only 63, after all.

Me: *laughing*

Dad:  So, what's the latest on the purse?

Me: No news.  I'm sure it's gone.  I guess I should be thankful I've learned such a valuable life lesson.

Dad:  Yes, it's good to learn a lesson.  Like what a hayfu is. 

Me:  Dad.  It's a haiku.

The winner of the Egg Beaters hayfu haiku contest is Darcie, with 944 votes.  Chelsea was a close second, with 805 votes.  Congratulations!

I Scream, You Scream

This week is the Bloggy Giveaways Carnival, and I'm playing along, with some help from the nice folks at Reddi-wip.  They're offering up--are you ready for this?--a one-year supply of Reddi-whip and Ben and Jerry's ice cream to one lucky reader of this blog.   

I know.  I just got a delicious brain freeze even typing those words.

For the next year, the lucky winner will two coupons per month for a free can of Reddi-wip, and two coupons per month for a free pint of Ben and Jerry's.  The retail value is around $170.  But the good it will do your mental health?  Well, you just can't put a price on that, my friends. 

For your chance to win, leave any comment below (be sure you provide a valid e-mail address).  I'll leave the comments open until this Friday morning, and I'll draw a random winner then. 

It's a week of fabuloso prizes at the Bloggy Giveaways Carnival, so head over there for a complete list of participants. 

*comments are now closed*

My Overworked Tear Ducts Beg For Mercy

Y'all are so smart and funny and creative.  I have been at my computer much of the day, watching your haikus roll in.  I have laughed and cried until I can't take it anymore.  When you have a few minutes, I encourage you to read through the comments.  I promise, it will make you want to call your mom.

But there had to be finalists, and it was incredibly hard to choose.  I tried to select five poems that were representative of all your contributions.   Here we go, in random order:

By Darcie at Such the Spot:
You have taught me that
because of a mother's love
I will never crack

By Anne Glamore at Tiny Kingdom:
You've been gone two years.
Your ghost disses my red hair:
"You look better blonde!"

By Chelsea at Crafty Cassie:
I always thought Mom
was bipolar til I had
children of my own.

By P.A.:
Mom, my heartmother
Not of your womb, but filled with
Your life's legacy.

By Veronica at Toddled Dredge:
"Girls can't play ball," they
told her once. Her grand-daughter
pitches and she smiles.

Cast your votes below.  The poll will stay open until 9 am this next Tuesday morning--whoever is ahead at that moment wins the Egg Beaters $1,000 prize.  Thanks to everyone who played along.  Your sweet entires were a real blessing to me today.

NOTE: I've heard that some people are having a hard time seeing the font in the poll box below.  (Not sure why, because it shows up fine on my end, but who can understand the vast mysteries of  the WWW?)  If you are having problems seeing it, try highlighting the entire box with your cursor--that should do the trick.  Sorry for any inconvenience! 

*UPDATED* How To Win a Thousand Dollars

Seriously.  A thousand dollars.  One-zero-zero-zero.

Egg Beaters has graciously offered to sponsor another rip-roarin' Rocks In My Dryer haiku contest in honor of Mother's Day, with a knock-out prize of $1,000 for the winning entrant.  They're spreading the word about their new Egg Beaters With Yolk product, which we're going to discuss for just a minute before we get to the cash, so bear with me.  Because I have egg issues.  Serious egg issues.

You know how a regular egg yolk has that white stringy thing that pokes out from it?  I don't know what that is, but it disturbs me.  Deeply.  In fact, when I fix eggs for my family, I end up thinking of that white stringy thing and I cannot bring myself to take a bite.  So while I should be excited about Egg Beaters because of the whole lower-fat, lower-cholesterol issues, instead I'm attracted to know the lack of a white stringy thing.  (And I know, perhaps it's there, and it's just all blended in, but let's not discuss it, because I'm enjoying eggs for the first time in YEARS.  And they're even lower in fat.  Excellent.) 

Now, the topic of eggs gets us thinking about mother hens, which gets us thinking about our own mothers (impressive seque, no?).  So here's how you can win Egg Beaters' $1,000 prize (which, incidentally, will be in the form of a pre-paid credit card, to spend however you'd like):

:: In my comments section below, write a haiku about YOUR mom.  Make us laugh, make us cry--whatever you'd like.  Here's how you write a haiku, and here's one about my own sweet mom, as an example:

You gave me life, and
even better, you give me
FREE BABYSITTING.

:: I'll leave the comments open until 8 pm CST tonight (Thursday).  I'll select the top five finalists from the winners, and I'll repost them here just as soon as I can, hopefully within a few hours. 

:: I'll post them in a poll format, so you can pick the final winner.  Whoever is ahead at 9 am CST Tuesday morning wins the $1,000 prize.

Good luck, everybody!  In thanks to Egg Beaters, click over there and have a look around, while you're at it.

*UPDATED*  Comments are now closed. 

Just In Time For a Mother's Day Treat...

...tomorrow I get to offer y'all the most gigantinormous giveaway I've ever held at this blog o' mine.  I'm so excited!  Some little chickadee is going to be very happy indeed, so be sure you come back here for the details tomorrow (comments will only be open for 12 hours--you won't want to miss it!)

Here's a hint:  there will be haikus.  Oh yes.  Haikus.

But Really, You're All Winners In My Book

Sadly, only one person could win the silver locket from The Fine Art Of Family...and the lucky girl is Mrs. Troop.  Congratulations!  (If for any reason Mrs. Troop is unable to fulfill her duties as Winner Of the Locket, a first runner-up will be chosen.  But don't hold your breath.)

Matt Maher

(Stay to the end for a gigantic giveaway!)

I approach contemporary Christian music the same way I approach my jeans (and yes, I realize that is an especially unholy analogy, but work with me).  I'm super-picky (is the theology good?  is the music pretty? does the waistband have a little give to it?), I don't choose very many, but I wear out my favorites and become a loyal fan for life.

That's a lighthearted way to say, in all seriousness, that the lyrics, the writing and the thought behind each song all matter to me.  I like artists who seem to be really grappling with the deeper issues of faith.

I've added a new favorite to my ultra-selective repertoire of favorites:  Matt Maher.   I got a sneak peak of his new CD, and I'm not kidding that it's the ONLY CD I've listened to for the last three weeks.  It's named after track 7, "Empty and Beautiful", which is an ironic title--although this CD is deeply beautiful, it is the opposite of empty.  There is some meaty stuff in there--this guy is an amazing musician and writer.  (Check out his bio here for his story).

My favorite song on the CD is...um...all of them?  If I had to pick a favorite, I'd say it's the title track, "Empty and Beautiful":

You fought the fight in me;
You chased me down and finished the race.
I was blind but now I see.
Jesus, you kept the faith in me.

Or possibly "Leave a Light On," since it has a little vignette (is that the right word?) in the middle referencing one of my favorite old Southern Baptist children's songs.  "Lay It Down" is a simple and precious worship chorus that will probably be sung in church camps for generations.  Many of the songs on this CD come, at least in part, directly from Scripture.  "Great Things", for example, comes from the Magnificat, and "For Your Glory" comes from Ecclesiastes 3:1-8.

This CD hits stores today, and Matt's record label is offering 100 bloggers a free copy.  Hurry, because it's limited to the first hundred participants!  (If you miss it, you can buy his CD here for only $8.97.)  Go here to read the details of the mega-giveaway--the only requirement is that you have a blog with a minimum of 50 page views a month.  You're going to love this CD, seriously--let me know what you think once you hear it.