The Epic Tale Of the Flesh-Eating Ladybugs and Their Untimely Demise

My four-year-old son Joseph received a lady bug farm for Christmas this year.  The day after Christmas we mailed in his certificate for the ladybugs that would fill it up, and he eagerly checked the mailbox every day.  A couple of weeks later, a bulky package arrived bearing a huge stamp on the front:  "Live Larvae Enclosed:  OPEN IMMEDIATELY."  (It's not everyday you find larvae in your mailbox--good times.)

We carefully followed the enclosed instructions to the letter.  The ladybugs were teeny little larvae; the booklet told us we could expect them to become pupa in a couple of weeks, then full-fledged lady bugs a few days after that.  My son, whose heart is extra-tender toward any living thing, checked his larvae many times a day for progress, sleeping with the farm under his bed for protection.  And I breathed many little prayers:  Please let them live, please let them live...

And they lived.  Just as the instruction booklet promised, they shortly turned into pupa, then dramatically, in a few hours, little lady bugs.  Joseph was beyond overjoyed.  But here is something you probably didn't know about adorable little ladybugs:  they're cannibals.  Only about half the larvae made it to full-grown ladybugs, so the grown ones crawled around and ate the dead bodies of their peers who weren't so lucky.  And thankfully, my sensitive boy just said, "Look, they're playing!" as the carcass feast ensued.

And here's another, um, interesting little factoid about ladybugs:  they poop in enormous quanitity.  I mean, they're tiny little poops, but they are everywhere.  You don't notice this when they're outside crawling around your flower pots, but when they're in an enclosed little farm on your kitchen table where you feed your family--trust me, you notice.

So, the other day, Joseph was carrying his ladybug farm across our entryway.  But he had opened the top, for some reason. He slipped on a rug and fell, and the lady bug farm flew across the room, landing upside down on the floor.  Thousands of little ladybug poops, and dozens of half-eaten carcasses, scattered all over the floor.  The wood floor.  The brown, hard-to-make-out-where-the-bugs-and-poops-and-corpses-are floor.  The floor my baby daughter crawls around on all day.  You see where this is going.

Big brother Stephen came to the rescue and searched out as many live ladybugs as we could find, which wasn't many.  But Wicked Mommy had to get out the vacuum cleaner and suck up the poops and the carcasses (remember, he had no idea they were dead because I didn't have the heart to tell him), and yes, a few live ladybugs, while my sensitive boy wailed in the background, "Mommy, NOOOOOOOO!"  Now there is a moment for the therapy couch someday. 

The moral of this story?  Perhaps there is a profound one, but I'm at a loss.  I'm coping with the fact that there is likely still much ladybug poop in my entry way, tucked into nooks and crannies.  And a traumatized four-year-old boy living under my roof.  This motherhood business isn't always pretty, is it? 

Comments

[Carol]

Bless his precious heart.

This reminds me of the time we sent off for a praying mantis egg sac. They hatched and that was cool. But things quickly got weird when they started eating each other and we had to let the survivors out into the garden. My daughter, 6y/o at the time, insisted on remaining outdoors for days to shoo away the birds so the mantises wouldn't get eaten. I believe their descendents are there to this day, eating aphids and hiding from birds.

[chilihead]

Ooooooh! Poor kiddo! And yet, I'm behind you 100%. There was nothing else you could do. Sometimes having to be the mom is the worst.

[Emily]

I don't know if I like ladybugs so much anymore.
lol

Poor guy... :(

[Liz]

yes. they poop. and they stink. we had a ladybug infestation in my dorm room in college. *shudder*

[Heth]

Oh the poor little guy! Trauma I tell you.

Just tell him it's the cirle of life. You know, from Lion King....only I don't think there were any mom's armed with vacuum cleaners in that story.

[Shalee]

Ummm, I think you should "thank" the giver of the lady bug farm... How about a nice big snake in return on their birthday?

Hang in there, Shannon. There's more fun in motherhood to be had...

[GiBee]

Doh! *Sigh*

Whatcha gonna do? Live with poopies all over your house, or... well ... guess there really isn't anything else you could have done.

Sorry about your little boys broken heart ... it sounds like he has a sweet and tender heart!

Kind of reminds me of that Kleenex AntiViral Tissue commercial with the buddhist guru that goes around saving all the little animals and bugs, but ends up killing his own germs (they are forbidden from killing anything).

I think their theme was (and fits ever so appropriately) "Thank Goodness for Forgiveness."

[Morning Glory]

There never seems to be a dull moment at your house. Love the ladybug story!

[Corina Bowen]

ahhh, poor little guy.. poor mommy!!
I had to giggle, and feel bad all at the same time!

[Natalie Joy]

We recieved a frog "planet", but have not sent in for the actual frog because it requires live crickets for food. Your story is one more reason NOT to get the frog, I do not need live crickets running around my house. Thanks for the warning.

[Natalie Joy]

We recieved a frog "planet", but have not sent in for the actual frog because it requires live crickets for food. Your story is one more reason NOT to get the frog, I do not need live crickets running around my house. Thanks for the warning. Sorry it was so traumatizing. Yet another reason to NOT get the frog. What happens when it dies?

[JD]

Oh that is a great post I will be back to find the profound moral!! Ladybugs be free!!!Free I say!!

[Kristie]

Thanks for making me laugh today. That is worse than the ants I got in the mail for the ant farm that escaped before I got them into the farm. Or the cocoons we watched all cotton-pickin'week and then the butterflies finally emerging while we were at church.

[momrn2]

I don't even know what to say. I'm so sorry... for you, for your son, for the lady bugs. We get an "infestation" of them every summer out in our yard by a certain line of bushes. If you ever decide you want more... feel free to come on over!

[Perri]

I can picture it perfectly in my mind. And it ain't a pretty sight. No doubt he will be on Oprah someday talking about Momma and her vacuum.

[Kathryn, the DYM]

This is funny and tragic on so many levels. Sometimes when I'm putting Laylee to bed, she'll cry out "MOMMY NO! DON'T DO THIS!" as though her very heart would break. I am SO glad people can't hear her from outside the house.

[Grammy]

I'm so sorry. But deep down, that child knows you love him, even if you do own a vacume and know how to use it.

[momrn2]

OK, could NOT resist. Honesly stumbled across this link tonight and knew immediately... YOU MUST SEE IT TOO!! Enjoy! :-)

http://www.insectlore.com/

They have a store and everything!! One stop shopping... :-)