I've been on Malarone for a while now--it's an anti-malarial drug. Even though I'm home now, I have to continue it for a full two weeks, just to be safe.
One of its side effects is personality disorder, which I seem to have escaped (unless you ask my husband. Please don't.)
But one of the side effects I have experienced has been really vivid, strange dreams. If you are the sort who feels the need to analyze every element of your dreams, Malarone would rock your world.
Last night, snug in my bed, I dreamed that I learned that Hubs and I had been married by a preacher who wasn't licensed, so we weren't actually married. We set out to right this wrong by planning another wedding. But we felt like we needed to do it in 48 hours, so we were really busy. We called and informed (not asked) our dear friends who have a beautiful backyard with a pool that we would be using their yard for the ceremony, and could they please hire a lifeguard because we wanted our children to be able to swim while we said our vows.
Evidently if your nine-year-old son does a canonball during the "to love and cherish" part, it really seals the deal.
Anyway, I called Shaun Groves and asked him to do the music, which he said he would do, but only if he could play old early '80's church camp music.
Evidently if the crowd sings "I Have Decided To Follow Jesus" during the "kiss the bride" part, you're hitched for good.
Then (and, by the way, kudos to those of you who have managed to stick with this post), I decided to do all the catering myself, so I prepared a bathtub-sized vat of chicken salad. And then, taking a break from our preparations, we decided to go have lunch with our old friend Jimmy Buffett (yes, JIMMY BUFFETT). As we ate lunch (chicken salad, of course), Jimmy showed us the pirate costume he brought for Hubs to wear in our wedding. And Hubs was just thrilled about this and put it on right away.
Because evidently if your prospective groom shows up wearing large hoop earrings and a skull-and-crossbones cap on your wedding day, then your wedded bliss is assured.
And that's it. Chicken salad, pirate grooms, and my illegitimate children doing the dog paddle, all in one night. Personality disorder? Not me.
Wouldn't even want to BEGIN to analyze that dream! So funny...gotta love Jimmy Buffet being part of the scene! Did you get to see what YOU were wearing?? Just curious...
Posted by: ukrainiac | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 02:23 AM
that is just hilariousss!! :)
Posted by: TransitionGirl | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 02:34 AM
I am impressed by your attention to detail - have you ever considered a new career as a Wedding Planner?
Posted by: JanMary, N Ireland | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 02:35 AM
I have to agree with the pirate part! we got married on a pirate ship...
http://luc.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=31782110&l=e0b75&id=20000084
now for the real reason i posted. you mention chicken salad. is this some wonderful yet basic recipe you have, or just dream of having? cuz I can't make chicken salad to save my life. I can make much more detailed things like turducken and the full thanksgiving menu, but chicken salad...not a chance. If it's real- Share!
Posted by: Rebekah | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 03:03 AM
LOL!
I’m sending Linky Love your way, because…are you quite ready for this? Maybe you should sit down…oh, you already are sitting? (Hmm…I usually do all my blogging standing on the highest branch of a tree in the middle of the Amazon somewhere over the rainbow. Not really, but that would be cool, wouldn’t it?) Well then, I have added your blog to my sidebar list of blogs, thereby increasing my list from five to something greater than five, and all because I think you’re really neat! Have a blessed day!
Posted by: Farrah | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 03:26 AM
Last night, I found out that I was carrying another couple's child. And I decorated the nursery bright orange. Using spray paint.
No. I think Malarone would send me over the edge.
Posted by: Fiddledeedee (It Coulda Been Worse) | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 03:27 AM
I have those kind of dreams and I'm not on any drugs! The worst are the ones where my husband's upset me in the dream and it's so vivid the next morning I have to remind myself not to be mad at him :).
Praying for you (and the others) as you continue to assimilate back into your daily life and culture.
Thank you for sharing.
Posted by: Susan | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 03:29 AM
I had exactly the same experience when traveling to Africa and using malarone. I dreamt my parents were in a canoe being chased by gators! Glad you are almost done taking that stuff!
Posted by: Debbie | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 03:56 AM
ROFLOL. Well, I didn't understand all of the explanation (being Australian and all) but I know the feeling of having strange dreams. I have medication which has similar side effects. I tend to dream my DH and I have really big arguments which is odd because we very rarely fight and even then it might be a comment from each of us (a little heatedly) and that's it!
Posted by: Lightening | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 03:59 AM
ROFL. Reminds me of my nightly dreams when I was pregnant!
Posted by: Jeni | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 04:59 AM
Wow.....and I thought your real wedding was pretty! It seems pretty bland in comparison!!
Posted by: mimi2six | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 05:13 AM
Ah Malarone! I took Malarone when I was in Kenya and I remember having those strange, vivid, crazy dreams. Fortunately (or unfortunately) I don't remember most of them now.
It seemed most of our group found themselves in one of two camps. Those who couldn't sleep because they had terrible insomnia from taking mefloquine and those who weren't sure they wanted to sleep because their dreams were freaking them out.
Posted by: Stacey | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 05:28 AM
I love that dream! I especially love the Jimmy Buffett part. My husband and I met at a Jimmy Buffett concert...good times!
Posted by: Beth_C | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 05:43 AM
hahaha.... you made my morning, THANKS!
Posted by: Amy @ Memoirs of a Mommy | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 06:09 AM
What.... it makes perfect sense to me! ;)
Posted by: Susan G. | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 06:37 AM
Oh dear - I have a flu bug and my chest hurts so bad when I laugh and I've laughed myself silly over this- what a wonderful dream! I think your wedding plans are superb and Jimmy Buffett makes sense - you were planning on serving the chicken salad buffet style weren't you???
Posted by: Linda Sue | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 06:39 AM
Well the good news is - it sounds like your dh was gonna go ahead and marry you the second time around anyway!
I've sometimes (jokingly) posed the same scenario to my dh to see if he would still marry me if we were not already by some fluke.
A couple we know did have a real experience like that...they were married in Taiwan and for some reason they were worried when back in the USA quite some time later, as to whether or not they were officially and legally married....or it could be that they just wanted to be "remarried" by a Christian minister... I don't believe they had a huge wedding complete with Jimmy Buffet in attendance but probably just a couple of witnesses in the minister's home :)
Posted by: Edi | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 06:44 AM
a mind (asleep & on drugs) is a terrible thing to waste!!!!
too funny
Posted by: mzzterry | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 06:45 AM
Obviously your mind is still jamming long after you go to sleep! This will soon subside and I fear you will miss your funny dreams. We will too! Glad you are getting some rest and recovering from the trip. Blessings.
Posted by: Jean Stockdale | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 06:50 AM
Whowzers!
That is too funny.
Posted by: misi | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 06:50 AM
I think I went to that wedding.
I found a rubber ducky in the chicken salad.
Posted by: Melanie | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 07:08 AM
I had the same effect several years ago after traveling to Nigeria... I only wish I had journaled/blogged those wacky dreams. Seven years later all I remember is that they were WACKY!!! Blessings on your return adventures~!
Posted by: Jill McGregor | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 07:13 AM
I guess, if you have to have a second wedding, you may as well have fun with it!
Posted by: jen | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 07:38 AM
I look forward to hearing of your future endeavors! :)
Posted by: Crazy Daisy | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:05 AM
What a great dream. Too too funny!
Posted by: Sister Honey Bunch | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:09 AM
Dadgum! Sort of makes me want to go on Malarone for a while. I can't remember the last time I had any kind of dream, let alone one like that! *grin*
Posted by: Megan | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:15 AM
That is hilarious! I love the Jimmy Buffett cameo. And don't we all know that being married in a pirate costume while people are swimming, with 80's church camp music blaring, and with tables laden with huge amounts of chicken salad (sitting out on a perhaps hot day) are the recipes for a perfect marriage. :) :) Aren't you glad they are just dreams?! :)
Thanks for making me laugh!
Posted by: Alaina | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:21 AM
Sounds like you've been in Margaritaville.
Posted by: A&EMom | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:31 AM
With a night of dreams like that, do you wake up needing a nap?
Posted by: Kelly Anne | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:45 AM
You're SURE it was a dream? Sounds almost entirely too possible to me. ;o)
Posted by: Jenni | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:46 AM
Gosh, I'm not feeling like my tooth falling out dream was so weird now. Thanks for that!
Posted by: fiveberries | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:48 AM
I'm glad you seem to be making the most of it. I didn't see anything from this post or previous ones about you actually *contracting* malaria, so I'm hoping that the meds were preventative. Wishing you the best!
Posted by: Sarah | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:49 AM
Drugs and dreams - a hilarious combination! I have no analytical skill here - but it made me laugh out loud!
Posted by: Laura | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:49 AM
That totally sounds like the dreams I always had when pregnant. With my second child I knew I was pregnant before I was ever even late due to weird dreams about elephants :-)
Posted by: Julie | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:51 AM
Too bad you didn't ask Jimmy & Shaun to sing together. That would have been awesome!!!
(P.S. I keep re-reading your Uganda stories and loving it. [And crying.] Thank you so much for sharing!!)
Posted by: Jenn C | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:52 AM
That's a pretty entertaining dream! Perhaps I should get me some Malarone, you know, just for the entertainment value. :)
Posted by: jenny | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:02 AM
oh how I laughed! you ROCK!
Posted by: Jenn | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:33 AM
Melatonin does the same for me! But your dreams seem MUCH more fun! Glad to see you back, and thank you for sharing such an amazing trip with us...
Posted by: Domestic Chicky | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:38 AM
Even your subconcious thinks it is time for you to laugh again!
Posted by: Terry | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:45 AM
And I thought I had crazy dreams!! Hey, maybe if you had dreamed a little longer, you might have found out the Johnny Depp was your Best Man. :-)
Posted by: Snowbird | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:46 AM
And I thought I had crazy dreams!! Hey, maybe if you had dreamed a little longer, you might have found out the Johnny Depp was your Best Man. :-)
Posted by: Snowbird | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:49 AM
I want an invitation to that wedding! LOL!
Posted by: Susanne | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:50 AM
Oh my gosh. I think I just lost 20 pounds laughing. I have some crazy dreams with out medicine, I'd hate to see what I was like on that!
You crack me up!
Posted by: Jes | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:53 AM
Remind me never to travel anywhere that I might need that drug. My dreams are messed up on a nightly basis anyway. They got worse while pregnant. I can only imagine what this drug would do to me. Jimmy Buffet, pirates, and chicken salad? Totally sounds like something I'd dream about. Except throw in a mad search for a restroom.
Posted by: Stephanie (PurdueLiz) | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:55 AM
Oh. I love it. Sounds like a SNL skit. I've been having strange, vivid dreams lately and I'm not even on anything ... except hyperdrive stress from packing to move twice in 30 days and looking forward to living in my MIL's house for those 30 days between houses. Yikes!
Posted by: Christy | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 10:00 AM
On my trip to Kenya, with the same med, I dreamed I was pregnant and I gave birth to a guinea pig and put it in a shoe box and I loved my baby very much!
On the down side, a very nice, older lady who was in our group, became very odd. Evidently, if you have a screw even slightly loose, the Malarone can intensify that problem. She didn't realize her odd behavior at all.
Posted by: Gretchen | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 10:01 AM
That's silly. :) And I had a doozy of a dream last night, too. WHEEEEE!
Posted by: Rebecca | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 10:34 AM
Mazel tov, my friend. May God bless your new marriage.
Oh, and I'd stay away from the vat of chicken salad if I were you. A vat of meat at an outdoor wedding is never a good thing.
Posted by: Kelly @ Love Well | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 10:38 AM
Sounds just like the kind of personality I'd love to have coffee with!!!! :-)
Posted by: Jen | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 10:57 AM
Wow. You need help. Serious help. Now. Please go immediately! Loved it :)
Posted by: Kristen | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 11:02 AM
And you thought your African adventures were over ;-)
Welcome home!
Posted by: LeeAnn (AKA Frazzmom) | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 11:15 AM
My husband is a psychiatrist. I'll have to have him listen to that one!
Brenda
Posted by: Brenda Kula | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 11:28 AM
And I'll bet you were dressed like Kiera Knightly, right?
All that's lacking is a parrot.
Posted by: Stephanie | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 12:06 PM
Wow! Last night, I dreamed that my high school friend and Kevin Federline tried to get me to join a kickboxing cult.
Seriously.
Posted by: bee | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 12:23 PM
TOO funny!
Posted by: Doris | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 12:26 PM
Thanks for the wedding ideas. I need to plan one!
I sometimes dream about people in the blogosphere. That usually means I'm doing too much interneting and not enough working. Can we say OBSESSIONS?
Posted by: lomagirl | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 12:43 PM
Haha! I had very strange, vivd dreams when I was pregnant. Hubby was always very amused when I would describe my nightly adventures!
Posted by: sheila | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 12:52 PM
Wow! Here comes the bride! :-)
Posted by: Miscellanous From Missy | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 12:57 PM
OMW that is too funny!!!
Posted by: Jana | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 01:09 PM
Wow. Gotta get me somma dat Malarone (sounds like a sick sandwich meat to me...). Nah, I have enough vivid dreams the way it is!
Kum-ba-yah...
Posted by: minnesotamom | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 01:34 PM
Can you please just keep taking the Malarone? It makes for great comic relief for your avid readers. ;-)
Posted by: Kris | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 01:41 PM
There is just too much greatness about this story to pick one thing to comment on. I Love It!!!
Posted by: Headless Mom | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 03:54 PM
This was soooooo funny!!! I only wish I had dreams like that. I have terrible-horrible-frightening nightmares....can't figure out why-can't stop them....thanks for the laugh..God Bless, Pam South Bend
Posted by: Pam | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 06:55 PM
Jimmy Buffett at a wedding? THAT is the kind of wedding I want to go to! :)
Posted by: Cindy | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 07:50 PM
Too funny! I want some of that stuff. I have long had a thing for Mr. Depp. I never mind him or his pirate suit appearing in my dreams.
Posted by: Rechelle | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:51 PM
whew that was pretty detailed! i have pretty crazy and vivid dreams as it is, i don't think i should ever take what you're on!
Posted by: lisa (lost pezhead) | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 09:53 PM
Anytime you need "Friends are friends forever..." crooned at your O-fishal wedding ceremony, I'm in. Especially if there's chicken salad.
Cause, you know, we Compassion bloggers are all friends forever now. Bound by a common intestinal critter and all. I feel a song comin' on.
Posted by: Shaun Groves | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 10:54 PM
I LOVE this! But I was disappointed that you didn't sing "It Only Takes a Spark...to get a fire going" ;) wouldn't that be better for a wedding?
I think coming up with all that in 48 hours (or less!) is fantastic. If Donn and I ever renew our vows, or find out we're not married in the first place, I'm calling you for help with the plans.
Posted by: edj | Wednesday, February 27, 2008 at 01:51 PM
ROTFL! I have those wacko dreams totally drug-free. Hormones have been known to kick them up a notch, though.
Hmmm . . . gives me some good blog fodders, as I had a couple of strange dreams recently. Thanks for the laugh! :D
Posted by: Dianne | Sunday, March 16, 2008 at 12:59 AM