Because We Could All Use a Book With the Word "Sane" In the Title

Yesterday I told you about my friend Mary's new book,  A Sane Woman's Guide To Raising a Large Family (you can read my detailed review here).  Want to win an autographed copy?  Just leave a comment below, answering the following question:

What aspect of motherhood has surprised you the most?

(If you're not a mom yet, no worries, just tell us what aspect of motherhood you're looking forward to most.)

I'll draw a random winner on Thursday morning.  (U.S. mailing addresses only, please.) 

Comments

[Kristin]

I love staying home with my kids. But I've been surprised by how much effort I have to purposefully make to actually spend time with them. And I've also been surprised at how often I'd rather just soak in the tub instead!

[Christa @ No End in Site]

I've been amazed at how your love grows exponentially with the addition of each new baby. It's not an "I hope I have enough love to go around" issue! You just have more to give!

[Jennifer]

I'm most surprised by how much a mother can love her children. I would die for them without question. Before I had children, I would have never known that magnitude of love.

[knit_tgz]

I am looking forward, simply, to live with them. I do hope that I will have a chance to have kids some day (32 and single, starting to worry it may never happen). But if it does, I will be looking forward to having to count them to see if they are all at the dinner table (I hope life will give me a nice, large-ish family), I will be looking forward to having the older ones starting to feel protective for the younger when they go to school, I will be looking forward to hugging them and correcting them and making sure they did their homework and going to meet the teacher.

[Rachel Harrison]

I am surprised at how great my kids are turning out! We get a lot of comments from people when we go out to local restaurants. They tell us how wonderfully well-behaved and gorgeous our children are! I love hearing it and I also love that my kids are great in public and at home. Don't ask me how we lucked out! Our kids are awesome.

[mombrud]

I guess I have been surprised by how different every day really is. I have had to learn to relax if I feel like supermom one day because I accomplished so much and the next day I want to sit and cry in the disaster of projects started and never completed.

[Antonia]

All of it :)

[Abbey]

I was most surprised to find out just how much my parents love me. I was holding my new baby girl and my heart filled with this new unbelievable love. Then my Mom walked in and I realized that this is how my Mom feels about me. I started to cry and was totally taken aback. You love your parents but it takes having your own kids to realize just how much they love you. It was, and still is, an earth-shattering change in perspective.

[Tai]

There are so many! But one area would have to be the joy in the small achievements. I used to think parents were so weird for getting excited over their kid not spilling milk or getting dressed by themselves etc. but now I get so giddy over these little feats!

[Lizzy]

I am surprised at how forgiving my children are and the unconditional love they give me over and over again as I mess up as their parent and their mom. What an example they are to me!

[MemeGRL]

Agree with so many of the above! And not to be a downer, but I continue to be shocked--shocked!--at how relentless it is. I did so much babysitting as a teen and young adult that almost none of the fun stuff (or unfun, really) surprised me. Delighted me, sure, but not a surprise. But even when the kids are with a beloved relative or sitter, they are still on my mind, all the time. And it just never, never lets up. That poet who wrote about your heart going around outside your body? Totally right in a way I couldn't possibly have understood before they were born.
That was the surprise. Still is, all these years later.

[Gloria]

I was totally surprised at how much my children taught me with their six different personalities. Sometimes they taught me more than I thought I wanted to learn, as I struggled through their babyhood, their young years, their (sometimes rebellious) teenage years, and on into adulthood. I'm still learning as my love for them has grown to include 19 precious grandchildren.

[Jody]

The absolute fiercceness of my love for my children-I had no idea and it hit me in the delivery room of my first baby and oh my gosh, I could barely handle it at first, it was overwhelming. But it makes every day a miracle, even the crummy ones, just to look in wonder at my kids and wonder where the heck they came from and how can I possibly love them so incredibly much-it is totally a God thing!!!

[Wendy]

How much I love my child. How much it would change me. How much it would challenge me. How much God would use it to make me new.

Thanks for the chance to win. I love her blog and will probably buy it if I don't win.

[Cherissa]

The most surprising thing: Motherhood has shown me how wretchedly SELFISH I really am. I thought I had it pretty much together before I became a mom. It's the hardest thing I've even been so thankful to be able to do!

[Melonie K.]

I've been really surprised by how different my kids are - and by the fact that there are moments when I love them with such ferocity that I just want to curl up in a chair with them and never let them go. I was really surprised by the fact that other people's kids' poopy diapers can literally turn my stomach, but my kids - pshaw. I'm good. I've picked eye goobies, boogers and ear wax out of their respective crevices and not thought twice about it. And I am a pretty meticulous germ-hater....no way you could get me to pick ANYBODY else's boogers or ear wax. LOL

[Heidi]

I was surprised when I became a mother of a first time driver. Sitting in the passenger seat watching her drive for the first time was a realization that she isn't mine...she is God's. For the first time, after 15 and a half years of "raising her", God taught me what it was to be a parent...continual surrender of her to Him and of my control to His.

[peggy]

So many things God has revealed to me about myself and my children, but the moment I treasure most is realizing (as much as my feeble human brain can) the depth of His love for me. When my first child was born and I looked into his eyes and held him in my arms I was awash with the tenderness and overwhelming feelings of unconditional love. I realized in that moment just how much my parents truly loved me and even how much more my Heavenly Father loves me, deeply, unconditionally, so much so that it is utterly indescribable.

[Kimi]

How much the parent-child relationship would teach me about the God the Father-daughter relationship. The parallels are amazing and convicting.

[Jennifer C]

How much you can get frustrated one minute then totally overwhelmed with love for them the next.

[Erin]

How life is completely different! My understanding of love and depth of feeling. I am amazed at the advocate I can be if I want to, and how I want to research every little thing my kids are going to encounter--much like Kari's comment about the "hippie freaks" turned into "pretty smart people." I love to watch what parenthood does to me, my husband, my friends, and family. It is fascinating and wonderful. What a wise God we have to design our lives this way!

[Jen]

I have defintitely been surprised at how unselfish I feel when it comes to her wants and needs. I would give up my last Samoa cookie, my last Lindt truffle, my coffee money, and even my life for her!!! :) I'd love to win this book and give it to my best friend for Mother's Day. She's the mom of 5 wonderful children!

[Emily]

Well, I'm not a mom, YET. Considering the horror stories I've heard about my husband as a child though, I'm already terrified of my future offspring. :-)

[Clara S.]

I'm always surprised by the fact that just when I get one thing figured out whether it be potty training or bedtime battles a new "problem" crops up. I just can never get it all figured out at one time. Keeps me humble, though.

[Jenn]

My husbands wants four kids, but I think I would be more sane with three. Either way, maybe this book would help :-)

[Pam]

I am totally surprised that 5 years into parenting I'm still very, very tired. And I'm surprised that it no longer surprises me when I find food in my hair (for clarification, it's not food from MY plate). I'm surprised how imperfect my parenting is even though I work at it with all of my heart. And I'm surprised at how wonderful a father my husband is.

[Charlsie Swadley]

I think that the absolute intense love that you feel for your children is something you can not possibly imagine until you actually have them!

[HopiQ]

Hmmm...I suppose that I'm surprised at how I've found myself incapable of being the kind of mother I want and need to be. I need the Lord's help desperately in each moment, in the tiny minutia of life. I am also surprised at the aching sweetness found bundled up in these five precious little people.

[Kate]

Just about everything has been a surprise in parenting, but one of the biggest surprises of all was how hard every cliche in the book hit me smack dab in the chest the moment I first held my daughter. It was love at first sight. Nothing can prepare you for that.

[Erin]

There are a couple of things that truly surprised me...1)how I could spend every waking hour watching my baby! and 2)I guess I expected to be a superhero mom/wife being able to have an immaculate house, everything organized, a hot meal on the table when my husband walked in the door, and a happy baby...who was I kidding...on a good day I might be able to get one of these things done. And I wouldn't trade a thing!! I love being a mom and look forward to our next addition! Thanks for the chance at a giveaway!

[Dorci]

I'm surprised by the degree to which I have to die to myself and my desire to always be liked by my children and the pain that goes along with the overriding necessity to train them up in the way they should go, to ease them down the path of growing up into responsible, moral, caring, sensitive, intelligent and godly human beings, hopefully men after God's own heart.

[Grateful for Grace]

I'm most surprised by how much I want the house to stay "presentable". This was not taught to me, trained in me or applicable in my growing up years or in my first few years of married life. Seems the more kids I have, the more I want the house to stay straight. Weird.

[Mae M]

I am surprised at how slow a day can go by with 5 kids ages 9,8,5,3,1 (two youngest with special needs) and yet the weeks, months and years fly by!!

I am also surprised how a 3 year old can bring you to your knees in tears to God for help:) (good place to be when you have kids)

[Melanie]

The thing that has shocked me the most about being a mom is how much I love my daughter. I had no idea I could love someone so much.

[World's Greatest Mommy?]

I know it's seems petty, but the thing that has surprised me most is the laundry. I never thought I would hear a continual hum of my dryer in the background, or think that luxury is 2 sets of washer and dryers :)

[Angela]

How much I would miss them when they moved away. We have two boys in their early 20s and an 8 year old. I can remember when the big boys were the age of our youngest, thinking how peaceful the house would be when they were grown. Now it is so quiet, I long for those noisy days again (I know they'll come again with #3, but I've learned what a treasure they really are).

[courtney]

How it is so easy to take life for granted but how truly miraculous having a baby is...now that I have three under the age of 4...how ridiculously hard it is to "raise" children.

[Jennifer Eastland]

I never expected that I would never again be able to read the newspaper or watch the news without getting a stomach ache when something bad happened to a child--any child, not just mine! I can't watch movies or TV shows when bad things happen to kids, even if it all works out in the end. Just can't do it!

[Melanie]

I am surprised how much I LOVE my children. And surprised that I have changed many, many poopy diapers and cleaned up puke, all without puking. :)

[Moriah @ Please Pass the Salt]

You know what, honestly?

THE LAUNDRY.

[Jenna]

I'm not a mom (yet) but I am so looking forward to sharing the parenting experience with my husband ... I know he'll be the best dad and I'll love him even more!

[Cathy]

Hmmm...hard choice, but maybe the noise level? Honestly, with four children, even when they are "being quiet", it's hardly my idea of quiet, or at least my idea of quiet pre-children!

[Formerly Gracie]

The depths of my compassion and patience for my son. He could be throwing the worse temper tantrum in the middle of a store and all I can think is "Oh, poor guy. What are you so upset?".

Of course, it's promptly followed by, "Why are doing this?" and "Oh my GOODNESS. SHUT UP ALREADY", but at least my first thoughts are nice ones.

[Audra]

How much it has increased my love for the Lord and how much better of an understanding I have of his love for me.

[Emily]

I had no idea how hard my mother worked. Or how little she slept. Or how much she loved me. You just cannot know until you have done it.

[Kris B]

The joy. I was a late and reluctant entry into the mothering race--starting at 38. I had no idea how fun and fulfilling it would be. I may have started late, but I am up to speed now as a mother of 5, and loving it!

[amy sanders]

just how hard it actually is to be consistent with discipline!

[Alli]

I'm surprised at how my standards for just about everything have become lower and lower with each child I have. Nothing really phases me now.

[TinaH]

We have five girls and I am SO AMAZED at how each one needs to be raised completely different. You would think some skills that you have learned in motherhood would carry-over...nope!
Also, I am amazed at how blunt people can be with my girls. Example: "WOW! Five girls...I bet your mom and dad were trying for a boy!"...I am serious! They get this comment all the time.

[Kristin]

I have been surprised by the immeasurable amount of love I have for my children. There are times when I am so overwhelmed by my feelings for them that I find myself close to tears.

[Candace]

I think that what has surprised me the most is how much my love grows for them. I have three now and if you told me that I had the capcity to love them all so much when I just had one I don't think that I would have thought it was possible. It's awesome how God just grows your heart as he grows your family.

[Kathryn B @ Expectant Hearts]

I've read some of the comments and now i"m having an especially hard time picking the ONE thing I was most surprised by... That I loved them so much, YES. I STILL (and my oldest is almost 11) can't believe I can physically FEEL my heart expand in my chest, I love them so much. But I think what surprised me almost as much as that is how different they all are! My first two were polar opposites and the 3rd is too! (I don't know how you can have 3 polar opposites..).. One of my biggest sadnesses is not really knowing what Seth's uniquenesses are/would have been....

[Kathy]

I'm looking forward to watching my children learn. I love watching little kids who are just learning to read sounding out any words they find.

[Kirsten]

I don't have kids yet, but I am sooo looking forward to it. I want to be a stay-at-home mom and be involved in their lives :)

[Sarah]

I am surprised that even on the busiest of days/moments a cute comment from my toddler about something new she has discovered can make me stop and think and appreciate the small things in life. A lesson on how grass is growing because of the rain from a toddler mades me see that we do have green grass on our side and I love my life no matter how busy and crazy it may seem.

[Tracy]

I am the most surprised (daily)that I can actually DO this! I can actually take care of another human life, and a home, and a career...! My entire pregnancy I thought how in the world will I be as good as my mom...now...I'm still NOWHERE near the level of "momness" as my own, but I am getting there...and learning daily that I am a good mom and I CAN do it!!

[Denise]

What aspect of motherhood has surprised you the most?

I was shocked at how easy it suddenly became for me to deal with puke & poop & all the other messes that my baby made. When I was a teenager & babysat the diaper changing part was what I dreaded the most. After my son was born Hubby & I had entire conversations about the changes in his poop.

[Kelli]

How busy it keeps me and how much I love it even when running busy.

[mumple]

What surprised me the most? How much FUN they'd be--to laugh with, and yes, laugh at (behind closed doors)

Some of the best laughs I ever had were over things one of them said, or did, that were just too pricless (and innocent) to NOT absolutely fall in love with.

[Jessica]

Surprised? That I want to stay home with my boys and will budget accordingly. I have my RN license and DO NOT want to go back to work even though there have been significant budget cuts at our church (my husband is the middle school ministry director). We have really altered our budget so I can still stay at home full-time with my boys. I love them and I love being at home with them.

Thanks for the opportunity to win.

[jen]

What about it isn't surprising? I think everyday how hard it is - that no one can prepare for you that, but how paradoxically wonderful it is at the same time.

[Marie]

That I would sacrifice things I want/need to buy things that the kids need. I have become very unselfish over the years.

[laura]

i'm constantly surprised that having children is making me a better person. no one ever told me that you don't have to start out patient, organized, and disciplined to be a good mom. God is truly using my children to refine me, just as He is using me to teach them.

[Tesa]

Through my children, I am surprised to learn so much about myself!! Parenting has made me realize how selfish I really am, how unorganized I am, how I control/or don't control my anger... As my father-in-law says, when you have children in the home it is like living in a glass house! You see everything, and others can see it, too, by looking at(or listening, or watching)your children!

[Ali]

My mentally challenged daughter. I adopted the cutest sweetest 1-yr-old baby (three years ago)knowing she has special needs. So what surprised me is that her carefree sheerly blissful attitude proved that I was the crazy one and she the sane whole enlightened being. Amazing.

[Rach]

I have been surprised at how easy it is to let time slip away during the day with multiple children and get nothing done. Organization and prioritizing to just get something accomplished throughout the day besides wiping noses and bottoms. LOL

[Angie - heartchild]

I have been surprised at the amount of laundry. I never considered the laundry. How did I miss that in Preparing to Raise Children 101?

[Christine Bobowski]

I was surprised that I was capable of loving two children I didn't give birth to as much as the two I did. I didn't expect to cry when Josie started Kindergarten so I didn't take the day off like I did when BB started. Instead, I think I cried more and had to call in for the day.

[Mercy]

What hasn't suprised me?

Growing up an only child, having an only for 5 years then adding two more and feeling for the first time that I have a FAMILY! The whole concept is amazing to me. I love that each of them is their own person and has special qualities. I love that I know them all so well and I have the ability to handle each of them the way they need to be handled. On an even more serious note, I never knew how much your relationship with your husband affects your relationship with your children. It is so important to fan that flame.

Oh and the laundry...
doesn't it just grow and multiply over night? Every single night??

Sounds like a great book by the way!

[Jenn]

I was surprised at how all-consuming mothering is. It occupies my every waking, and most of my sleeping, moments, even when my kids are not with me. I see the whole world through a different lens now that I'm a mom - my kids are the context for almost everything.

[GiBee]

What aspect of motherhood has surprised me the most? The fact that my heart can break right in two if my son is injured in any way, or ill. I wish I could take it from him.

[Emily C]

The thing that's surprised me the most?

The fact that I can NEVER kiss those little boys enough. EVER. Even if they're being stinkers.

[Elizabeth]

How hard it is to juggle everything and do it all well. How hard it is to deal with 6 different personalities and find out what works best for each of them. How easy it is to love each one until my heart feels like it's going to burst!!

[Jeannie]

We have a large family and I have a daycare. I could use some sanity. Thanks for talking about such a great book.

[Elizabeth Giger]

I have been surprised at how well I am able to function with so little sleep! It is only by the grace of God...He truly does give us exactly what we need. Not always what we want, but always what we need!

[Sarah L]

How you are never off duty!

[Jill Lang]

I never wanted kids, until I met (and married) someone that wanted a big brood. I never spent time around babies or kids growing up, and I am in awe of how fun they are, how FUNNY they are, and how different their personalities have been since the moment each was born. Maybe because they're close in age (5, 3, 1, and #4 due this fall), I never had that feeling people describe as worrying that you won't love each one as much... I love my little people all equally, yet VERY differently.

[Lorie]

The fact that there are days when I just don't like my son. I still love him, with all my heart, but when he's being an annoying, whiny 3 1/2 year old - I just don't like him & it makes me feel guilty.

[Judith]

I love all the above comments and they are true in my life as well ........ (even the one about how many times you have to stop them from putting things in their noses! LOL)
But for me the amazing thing is to realize how much my kids love and need me .... that old as they are (34, 28, 23, 19) I'm still MOM to them; that I'm an anchor in their lives; that they depend on me; that my love is important to them.
You see, I still feel that way about MY mother (she's 91) It blows me away to understand how mine feel about me (I'm honored beyond belief, and hope I can be worthy of their love and trust.)
Motherhood is amazing.

[Alaina]

Many aspects of parenthood have surprised but perhaps the biggest surprise was that I could actual handle vomit. :) It was something I dreaded above all else but when it's your kiddos, it just doesn't seem so bad. Man, I love being a mom!

[Serena]

I was so surprised when I looked at my firstborn and realized that the way I feel about her is the way my parents feel about me. I had so totally underestimated their love for me. It just boggled my mind.

Also, I was very surprised to find myself holding a baby while pushing an empty stroller. When I'd seen parents doing this before I had a baby, I thought, "Can't parents just tell their child what's what? Put them in the stroller!" Ha! Oh man, it sure doesn't work that way. (I'm really more of a babywearer anyway, but it just goes to show ya...)

[Barbara]

God has blessed me, so far, with 5 beautiful daughters and 4 souls in Heaven. I have been surprised by how effective being a mother motivates me towards sainthood and how loving my children helps me understand a little better how God loves me.

[Michele Laramay]

I would love to read this book! I only have five, but they are ALL boys, so that must count for something.

[Elizabeth]

DH is one of 5,and I am the youngest of 6, yet by our not getting together and starting to have children until late 30s/early 40s, we're limited in the # of children that we will probably have -- we have the iconic girl and boy, but have been challenged lately in conceiving a viable 3rd (two miscarriages). I lay in the quiet, sniffing their hair and snuggling their warm little bodies and wish that I could have a dozen!! It's chaos, but it's MY chaos, and I LOVE EVERY MINUTE!! *Ü*

[Amanda]

I think I'm most surprised at how much non-stop work it is to be "momma". I guess my mom and grandma's and aunts made it look pretty easy.

[Melissa]

I had four kids in five years (and no multiples). I knew I wold love my children, but how fierce the love is has taken my breath away. I also was surprised at how hard it is to be a stay at home mom. It is the hardest and most fulfilling job I have ever had.

[michelle]

How quickly it goes...and how much you love them.